A new entry to the deployment plan...

Gal: "There's an asteroid coming, is that our application's fault?"

What's going on?

PM: "I don't even try to know anymore."

Guy: We're not going to build the app for this [platform], because no one's gonna buy that [platform].

But why "butter"?

Guy: "This next round of testing needs to be butter."

And thus a new word was born...

Guy: Including [pointy-haired boss] for in-loop-edness.

PM: Do you think they need to do any more coding on the code?

Time Warp

Frustrated Sensible person: "I have not filled you in on the stupid month I had yesterday!"


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

A bit of twitter for context...

Guy: "Who clicked my tweet?"

Tales from Deployment #3 - 14th Hour Math Failure

Guy 1: 5 doesn't go into 130.
Guy 2: I don't think it does either.
Both: Wait...

Tales from Deployment #2

Guy #1: Do we have a 7-11 here?
Guy #2: Nope.
Guy #1: I guess I'll keep working here then...

Tales from Deployment #1

Guy #1: What are you doing?
Guy #2: Weaving a tapestry of filth.

Beer on Sunday?

Guy: "No, you can't buy beer on Sunday, but you sure can steal it!"

And she coined a phrase...

Gal: "It was a fool of traffic."

Guy: It's not like it is clouds everywhere.

He has a firm grasp on the obvious...

Guy: A key rule in adding an ingredient to a dish is to actually have said ingredient on hand.

Your command does not compute

Boss: "When we you been done?"

Competitivity

A new fictional word heard after a meeting: Competitivity. Still determining the proper definition.

Simple Math!

Guy: "4 tacos times $2 a taco. Simple math = YUM!"

El Yay!

Guy 1: "It's time for a scary doodle!"
Guy 2: ???

How does the aging thing work?

Gal: "He was young well before he was geriatric."

Wait... what kind of humor?

Guy: "I have a self-defecating sense of humor."
Group: ???

Go with what you know

Gal: "Are you going with us to the Fish Market for lunch?"
Guy: "Yep."
Gal: "Ok, good. What's good there?"
Guy: "Um... fish?"

Clothing Battle

Gal: "Watch out, he's wearing a tie."
Guy 1: "That's okay, I'm wearing jeans."
Guy 2: "Cuz we all know, jeans trump ties."

Thus sayeth the Defect Thief

Guy: "This build is much more... validatiful."
Group: ???

How do you say onomatopoeia?

Gal: #loudexcitedshriek
Guy: That's how you pronounce an exclamation point.

I should feel ashamed of myself for saying this...

Guy: "I'm so awesome, I am now a verb."

I don't think that's right...

Manager: "What's the opposite of high maintenance? Un-maintenance?"

Person: "Would you like to bring up anything you aren't aware of?"

I do?

Guy: "You have to be smarter than the coffee maker."

It really is easy to use

Guy 1: "According to my 2 year old, the iPad is easier to use than a potty."
Guy 2 (mutters): "It must run in the family."

You Have What Now?

Guy: "Do you have a sec?"
Girl: "Yep, I have lots of secs."

More than 0

"I would probably bump that up to more than 0."
Guy reviewing estimate.