Eager to Please

Guy: "Yeah, whatever's good for me."

Guy: "So what days are you going to be off tomorrow?"

Now I know...

Boss: "'Bad' is not a good word."
Non-boss: "Thanks for clearing that up for me."

Two Perfectly Matched Cliche's

Well you know hindsight is what it is.

Whole new genre

Muppet character: I love my nerdery.

Quality vs Quantity

Guy: we need to have better meetings.

Other Guy: how about we just have more?

Yeah... Sure you do...

Gal: "My neck hurts."
Group: "Why?"
Gal: "You know, I do acrobatics at night."
Group: "..."
Gal: "Y'all know I sleep alone!"
Guy: "Meeting over..."

The perfect response to the completely inappropriate joke.

Guy #1: "That's what she said."
Guy #2: "But why'd she say that?"